Ahhh...Better

It's been a few days since I deliriously vented and after a sleepless weekend and a visit to the doctor, I was told to immediately go to the ER because I was severely dehydrated with a really inconsistent blood pressure. My mom and sister take me over where I can barely stand straight without thinking the sky was spinning around me. (Imagine yourself at your coherent drunkest state.)

After waiting almost an hour, a room opens where I get all the goodies - IV, blood tests, peewee tests, tons of pain meds, antibiotics, and all kinds of other meds shot up through my IV. My arms are a dead giveaway that I'm a junkie from all the vein poking that was done. Ha ha NOT!

The doctor finally tells me what's wrong after my family doctor is stumped at what may be causing everything. I have a kidney infection and because of all the other symptoms I had, my blood shows that I'm potassium deficient and now gotta take these horsepill sized potassium tablets along with my antibiotics for the next two weeks.I think the highlight of the whole hospital visit, though, is that the doctor and nurses kept giving papers for my mom to sign which in turn she made me sign. In the end the doctor asked where my mom was when she was getting the car and then looked at my chart once again. The whole time I was there, they all thought I was a minor - 17 to be exact. Great. Either I really do look damn young or they can't do their math because my date of birth was on every sheet I signed.

Since the hospital, I still have fevers and headaches. I'm still sweating a ton, but the medicine's definitely helping it not be so bad. Thanks to everyone who sent me their get well wishes. It's so absolutely touching to know friends are worrying about you.

On two other sidenotes, my work laptop decided to get sick with me. Graham says they're sympathy pains. Blah. Status: Currently being diagnosed at HelpDesk Hospital.

Also, today (actually yesterday July 28) is technically my first year at Google. It's today that I went fulltime after being a contractor. Woohoo.

It's not even insomnia... it's sheer sweat and being wide awake from napping most of the day. I've watched a couple of really random shows on the 'Oxygen' channel, Sister Act 2, an episode of Coupling, The Golden Child, and I'm currently watching an episode of MacGyver.

Hopefully the doctor will have some sort of explanation tomorrow.

Today started off worse than yesterday. I woke up bright and early, freezing. I think it was about 5am. I pulled out another blanket and put a sweatshirt on, only to wake up later in the morning sweating yet again. I took my temperature and it was at 104.3 . That's just not right. I swear that's straight brain damage. Half dead I jump into the shower to cool down and guzzle about a gallon of water. Finally my temperature goes down to 102.3 and I sleep through the afternoon. Apparently (based on the news), the weather's supposed to be beautiful today, but I don't think I ever left my room unless it was to get more water downstairs. One second I'm freezing...another second I'm soaked with sweat. I sleep again and it's finally now that I feel somewhat okay. This has got to be the most random sickness ever.

Delirious venting...

So much for hanging out with Alice and Kingston tonight... I left work early shivering uncontrollably. I've never felt so damn helpless before. To backtrack, the AC in our building died earlier in the day so I took an early lunch with CiscoRick. Damn SJ is far when your tummy is grumbling.

I get back only to find out that AC is still dead. I'm sweating profusely and down to just a tank top. Andrea and I finally agree that we need to work somewhere else and go to another building. Ahhh, finally. I can breathe. After a while, we return to find out the AC is back but I'm starting to get cold so I put my sweater back on. I keep shaking and I can't control it so I sit in the sunshine for a while. I go back to my desk and the shaking won't stop so I decide to go home. I whine a bit to my mom on the phone and she automatically tells me to drink tea and sleep. I take her advice but before I do that, I decide to take my temperature - 102.4 . Great. I jump into my bed coz i'm freezing, even with sweats and a sweatshirt on. Half an hour later I'm sweating like I've ran 10 miles. I jump out of my bed but I'm freezing AGAIN. So even though it's 80 degrees outside, my blankie comes out of hiding. Being wrapped up in blankie remind me that he's been through everything with me. It's only now I've stopped shaking - instead now I'm sweating. I guess you can't have everything.

I See Crazy People

Call me weird but I was raised thinking that every person in the world was genuinely nice and honest. I grew up on the peninsula where everything's green, where you could leave your doors unlocked, and where people were always friendly. Catholic school and my parents sheltered me pretty good. College was the first time I left home to be on my own and culture shock was an understatement. As the years passed, I learned lessons about people on my own. Some were dishonest, some hurt me, and some were genuinely nice. Friends came and went. Boyfriends came in and out of my life. I even dealt with my fair share of both psycho girls and stalker guys. I hated being jaded.

Today, I was having lunch with Beeker before he left for Vancouver. We ordered our lunch and my tummy was looking forward to some yummy thai food. The satay came out and we continued to wait for the rest of the lunch. Suddenly, we heard all these people screaming at each other. There was even a little kid crying on the telephone. Apparently, the kitchen staff was getting into a scuffle in the back of the restaurant and the customers all sat there in amazement. Our waiter finally comes out and apologizes for the wait. He tells us that the food we ordered wouldn't be made and continues to apologize. We're comp'ed for our satay and each customer walks out of the restaurant. So much for thai food.

The more I venture out of the peninsula, the more I realize that I live in a bubble. Don't get me wrong. I hate drama and complication, but I'm glad I've learned there's crazy people out there. I loved growing up thinking the world was a good place where no one could hurt you, but I think I'd rather tell my future children about the reality of life. Some people will surprise you with their bad intentions, while others actually have good hearts.

Hot bath? Massage?

As promised, I said I'd write about learning how to rollerblade.

Previously I mentioned I decided to play a day of softball and go out with the girls Saturday night. I even briefly mentioned going rollerblading on Sunday - all after being already half dead from Saturday's festivities.

Sunday comes rolling around and I agree to learn how to rollerblade with Coach Beeker. He plays a ton of hockey and has been rollerblading for a while now. He even reassures me that he's a good, patient teacher so I'm game.

We end up driving up to the city, where he suggests that we blade along the Embarcadero. It's gorgeous weather and the Embarcadero is beautiful in the daytime. In all the time that I've lived in California, I realized that I've only driven along this street. We park near Delancey Street Restaurant and the whole way up to the city from Daly City, I'm pretty much psyching myself out. I keep imagining all these nasty things happening to me - eating it pretty bad in front of a ton of people, cutting myself up pretty bad, hitting my head, etc...

I buckle up, put on my knee pads and Beeker's wrist guards. I even sit on the sidewalk for a while paranoid of standing up. I finally do and pretty much eat it right away. Great. This is a bad sign. Keep in mind we're on the opposite side of the flat part of Embarcadero so there's even a street to cross. What in the world was I thinking? Slowly, we make it across the street and I'm already floored that I wasn't run over or that I didn't eat it in the middle of such a busy street.

Coach Beeker teaches me the basics and slowly we start up the street. He promises we'll stop once we hit the 'yellow building'. Damn that yellow building. It was so far away in my mind. We make it there and I start getting the hang of it. I want to go further so he tells me to go to the clock tower... and then to the flags.... the second flags... the tent... this parking sign... to Fisherman's Wharf. I made it without a fall! *tine's head starts inflating*

My foot starts cramping and I'm hating on all the cobblestone at Fisherman's Wharf so we start heading back. In my head I thought, the further we skated the further it was back to the car. Great. We start back and I weave through people, through poles that are in my way. Beeker warns me of the sidewalk ramps, about accidently falling into the oncoming traffic. I'm actually going to make it back to the car without a fall or scrape.

A truck decides to pull out of a driveway and stops. The street comes to sort of a decline and I pick up some speed (I'm sure it was barely anything but to me, I'm flying!). I sort of learned how to stop and I could somewhat turn and slow down. In this instance, no matter what I did, I wasn't slowing down and all of Embarcadero could hear me screaming, 'I'm not slowing down!'. Instead of smashing myself into the truck, I try to turn and eat it pretty bad on my elbow and left side. Beeker comes to the rescue, as well as some guys on a bike ready to beat down whoever it was that knocked me down. I assure everyone I'm fine and get up to sit down on the nearby bench. *tine's head starts deflating* I knew I jinxed it when I thought that I'd make it back unscathed.

I sit for a bit and finally gather enough courage to get up and skate back to the car. A few minutes later, I see the yellow building I was so scared of initially. A few more minutes and we're back to the street I first crossed. I'm back to the car in one piece and I hug Beeker to thank him for such a happy, fun day. Reminder to myself for my next rollerblading lesson: Buy elbow pads and learn how to turn.

After this crazy weekend, I'm in need of a long hot bath or a massage. Siskee?

*random thought* I go in these crazy spurts of blogging.. one minute it's every day, maybe even a few times a day. Lately, it's going on the once or twice a week... odd phases.  (The randomness probably stems from utter exhaustion.)
 
Since I knew I wasn't planning on going out on Friday (because of this annual charity softball tourney), I decided to go out Thursday night with Beeker, Justin and Helen. We hit up Suede (the old Bas) and bump into my roomie, Alice and Nelly... My sister, Mykee, Angela and Albutt even decide to come out, too! Prior to coming out to party, I decided to play a bit of Kingdom Hearts after finishing work.   Can you say addiction? I literally played for three hours and forgot to even eat dinner.  It was 9pm and we needed to meet Justin at 10pm and I was still in my pjs. No dinner + drinking + drinking more soju = drunk tine
 
Friday comes rolling around and I'm a zombie at work. I get through the day and stay home for the night to have some dinner and watch movies with Beeker. Nice and relaxing. Mmmm
 
Saturday is the big softball tourney that I've been looking forward to all week.  I've had this huge softball withdrawal ever since our work league finished up.  Plus, to top it off it was a sour feeling that was left in my mouth when that league ended but that's another story for another day.  Softball straight from 1:30-7:30 which entailed 4 games back to back. It's a single elimination tourney but we dominate the first two games 18-2 and 16-3.  In playoffs, we kill the next team 12-6.  As we wait for the next game to begin, I see all these familiar faces from Twin Creeks - RINGERS! We also find out that the last game they played, they killed them 30-3. So yes, we lost this last playoff game and come in second BUT the score was 10-5. Nothing to be ashamed of, considering that a a six foot chick on their team hit further than any guy on my team.  
 
Body pain and massive headache sink in.  (I flake on my friend's bday dinner because of this *sad* )
 
I also made plans to meet up with the girls this same night. Not realizing softball would go this late, I still attempt to make it out to Oakland for Organic.  I was bored and half dead, but it was nice to bump into friends I hadn't seen in a while. Plus, my friend Anna hooked it up so what the hey.
 
Again, body pain sinks in even further when I wake up.
 
I head to my parent's house for lunch to visit with my aunts/uncles in town from the east coast. I pick at my food and I'm out the door to meet up with Beeker to go rollerblading. Yes, you heard me correctly. After being half dead from Saturday, I still agree to go rollerblading.  We drive up to the city, where the weather is absolutely beautiful! A day of rollerblading (errr, learning how to rollerblade) on the Embarcadero gave me such a better outlook of the city. I'm so used to seeing the urban gloomy side of the city.  If only it was like this every day I wouldn't be such a suburbian girl. 
 
Learning how to rollerblade is a story in itself for another post. I warned you of the randomness of this post.
  
 

After work and last minute, I decide to go take up Beeker's invite to watch Anchorman with him and his roomie, Jon. Their other friend, Linda, comes along too and it turns out I'm really good friends with her boyfriend. The world is too small.

Anchorman was damn hilarious though (watching Beeker laugh hysterically next to me came in as a close second). If you liked Old School, this movie will make you practically pee in your pants.

Considering what time it is, I'm wide awake. I think it's from a nap I took earlier.

Weekends are never long enough for me. I set out to vacuum my house and do some laundry. Instead, I didn't vacuum and I did one load of laundry (an hour ago). Friday night started with dinner with Peggy. Her husband Tom (more Austin transplants)is in Paris for work again and it was perfect time to play catch up. Dinner ran a little late so getting home and out the door for Beeker's hockey game lagged. I was supposed to be there at 9 and i get there almost half an hour late. Disappointing someone absolutely sucks! No matter how much I apologized, I still felt like shet. Luckily, it all worked out and their team kicks butt. I even got a few cool pictures. After the game, we head to the city for Joe/Carly's going away party. I make my cameo and off to Cloud 9 we go... We make a couple more rounds only to start craving for our usual late night tapsilog run.

Saturday starts off late coz I sleep in. Beeker decides to introduce me to a PS2 RPG game, Kingdom Hearts. Imagine Disney intertwining with Final Fantasy. I play for 2 hours (it seemed like half an hour) and I'm addicted. So addicted that I'm late for a friend's bbq. I finally make it over there with a chocolate cake in hand. I meet a bunch of asian people with austrailian accents. Mmm... I veg around my parent's house for a while and then finally head home to pass out. I get a call from some of the homies to head up to the city for a hip hop party (Apollo and Shortkut are supposed to spin that night so that usually guarantees grooving beats, lots of dancing, and a chilled out crowd).

Sunday I go to church with Beeker and somewhere in the middle of mass, I catch myself smiling. It felt good to be at church with someone else. I'm so used to hearing mass by myself or with my family. I quickly thank god for giving me such a happy moment. We watch My Sassy Girl and Beeker has mixed feelings about it. He's not too happy that Kyun-Woo is a 'cuddlebitch'. Kingdom Hearts calls my name and again, it's hard to pull myself away from it.

Kimmy was sweet enough to share in her raffle winning of a free makeover. Thanks! Really though, we didn't cheat with the pictures. We just really needed to look like we needed makeovers. Ha ha

People have always told me that you're supposed to name everything in your life of importance. They should have some sort of identity. So, I named my car. My car's been with me since early college and has taken me everywhere I've needed to go (including Austin, TX!). I named her TB - Tempermental Beyatch. If you didn't drive my car, you'd be irritated about its quirks, you wouldn't understand all the different sounds, and you'd grow a bit impatient about how high maintenance she is.

It was time for TB's checkup at the repair shop so I drop it off at my pop's place. I come back later in the day to pick her up, only to find out there's all sorts of things wrong. First of all, there's a coolant leak they can't find. Then there's something else with the cylinder head (sp?) where it's causing the water and oil to mix. Does this all make sense?

It's at the point whether you debate on spending the money to fix her or put the money towards another car. Sad! I've grown to have such an emotional attachment - so much that I'm blogging about her!

Jamdat IPO

I'm not usually one to plug news breaking articles, but check this out! My brother started working for them a while ago and just gave me the good news. *high five*

Being with someone you really genuinely care about shouldn't be a compromise...it's just supposed to flow. Everything just fits in place and you connect on every level. It's simple. It's not trivial.

It's hard not to second guess it though. It almost becomes a fear. There's a fear that it'll all one day disappear. It'll be some short lived infatuation that disappoints you.

So why is it human nature to question something so good?

Many times before, I held myself back from opening up fully to people I dated. I feared that I'd be judged, that I'd have to justify who I've become. I had to censor myself, almost like censoring the types of things I write about.

It's almost second nature for me to show someone all the potentially bad sides of me first. That's logic to me. You show someone all the quirks and faults. If he still wants to be there with you, then at least you know you're not wasting your time getting to know this person. Ironically, it's kind of hard to go through the laundry list of things you deem as faults, though.

Why in the world would I want to be so vulnerable to someone that may not look at you the same afterwards? There's absolutlely no logic in that...

I thought about it some more. I do it because I want the real thing. I don't have the time or patience to deal with immature or ignorant people. I don't want to be someone that's "ideal" or "safe". I want the fairy tale.

I think I've eaten the equivalence of a cow this past three day weekend. (If you're vegan/vegetarian, I suggest you stop reading now.) Sunday, we went through fajitas, chicken, steak skewers, veggie skewers, korean short ribs, hot dogs, and more steak later on in the night. I think the grill was constantly being used all day/night long. To top that off, Alice brought some clams with linguine and my parents decided to make some pancit (noodles) for me too. It was a food fest, outside of the drinking. The sangria I made seemed to be a hit, especially the batch that I let sit overnight.

After making through this food fest and waking up with a lump in my stomach, I have a craving for Max's of the Philippines. The fried chicken is so yummy there and Beeker who lives about 5 minutes away has never been there. We get there and the place is packed. Our tummies demand immediate gratification, so we go to another place around the corner - Ongpin.

I'm soon realizing that filipino food is definitely not made for vegetarians/vegans. One time after a team outing, I decided to take my coworkers there. Most of them aren't too meat friendly but I figure that all the veggie dishes should be fine. I don't realize that they're cooked in beef/pork products until I actually think about it. I think there actually turns out to be one item on the whole menu that's vegetarian friendly. Bad choice. Maybe that's why i'm such a carnivore.

I digress.

Beeker and I fall into food coma. We're half alive/half sleeping when I get a call from my parents. They're bbqing at home since my brother's in town and want me to come over. I finally make my way back to my parent's house only to grub on more beef - hamburgers, beef sinigang (tamarind soup), pork bbq, and halo-halo (filipino dessert). Again, I'm stuck in food coma. Notice a pattern here?

The salad bar at work will definitely find more visits from me this upcoming week.

It's Saturday night and I'm getting ready for my annual 4th of July bbq - it's usually family and close homies of mine that go. Along with the usual jello shots, I decided to make sangria for the first time. I googled sangria recipes from one of my favorite restaurants in the city - Cha Cha Cha. I decide to follow one of the suggestions and continue to also experiment. After tasting the jello shots and making sure the sangria is good to go (as well as make some graham cracker snacks), tine's one drunk puppy. It's a pretty good indication of what's to become of the weekend.

Ever have those blogging moments when you're craving to write but can't really pinpoint what it is that you want to write about? My mind's almost to capacity and I still can't figure out how to put it into words. These are the moments I reach for my good ole traditional journel and start jotting down random thoughts.

Happy Canada Day!